A comely redhead was thrilled to have obtained a divorce and dazzled by the skill and virtuosity of her lawyer, not to mention his healthy income and good looks. In fact, she realized, she had fallen head over heals in love with him, even though he was a married man.
"Oh, Sam," she sobbed at the conclusion of the trial, "isn't there some way we can be together, the way we were meant to be?"
Taking her by the shoulders, Sam proceeded to scold her, "Snatched drinks in grimy bars on the edge of town, lying on the phone, hurried meetings in sordid motels rooms - is that really what you want for us?"
"No, no..." she sobbed, heartsick.
"Oh," said the lawyer. "Well, it was just a suggestion."
___________________________
Two drunk blondes are stranded in the middle of nowhere trying to get home. The first blonde needs to pee so she tromps off into the bushes. After almost 10 minutes the second blonde begins to get worried and heads into the field to look for her friend.
She walks for half a mile until she finally finds the first blonde kneeling beneath a horse, blowing him.
"What in the world are you doing that for?" she slurs.
The first blonde sucks her lips away from the huge cock and drools, "Hold on, I think I may be able to get us a free ride home."
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